Straight-backed and strident march ordering a returning soldier back to his lovin’ duties with Anne. A shoo-in for No.1 in 1946 I’d have thought, but ten years later it sticks out like a teddy boy in a bearskin hat. (More anachronism fun with the lyrics too – “A girl who loves a soldier is either sad or gay”! Hur hur.) Shelton sounds bossily prim on the verses and downright scary on the chorus – rarely has demob seemed so unappealing. For all that “Lay Down Your Arms” has a brash charm – if there were any more songs like this on the list I’d probably despise it; as it is curio value wins out.

Score: 3

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